Song: "No Tears" by Scarface
Level Of Embarrassment: High
Regardless of race, we've all been there. That moment when, whether it's work-related or your girlfriend just broke up with you, the need to let off some steam leads an angry dude to channel his inner demons through some aggressive, profanity-laden gangster rap. Unlike Office Space's tragically named, nerdy honky Michael Bolton (David Herman), though, most of us are smart enough to keep those karaoke sessions indoors. You know, without any company.
Feeling all kinds of gully thanks to Scarface's "No Tears," Michael, who's stuck in a serious traffic jam, busts out some of Face Mob's hardest rhymes ("I won't stop until I see your monkey-ass drop"). That is, until a black dude walks by his car selling flowers, which causes Michael to remember that he's a corny, pasty, shook white dude, lower the music, and lock his door. Remember, corporate gangsters don't dance—they bitch out. —MB