2. Alexander (2004)
Director: Oliver Stone
Stars: Colin Farrell, Angelina Jolie, Val Kilmer, Anthony Hopkins, Jared Leto, Rosario Dawson, Christopher Plummer
Oliver Stone’s disastrous biopic on Macedonian conqueror Alexander the Great has so many things wrong with it that it seems unfair to cast the heaviest blame on Farrell’s lead performance, but, fuck it, the undeniably miscast actor deserves the scorn.
Alexander is the most glaring example of Farrell’s inability to carry a movie; asked to exude both macho presence and layered gravitas, he stumbles through Stone’s catastrophe with neither intact. And boy does the audience get to watch Farrell stumble—at nearly three hours long, Alexander plays like an extended study in how not to cast a cinematic epic.