Heeeeeey, happy Italian Flag Day, (the tricolored flag first premiered on January 7, 1797) everybody! No, seriously. We love a celebration, and there's-a no better way to commemorate the spiciest meatball in all of flagdom than to offer up an ennead'or nonet, take your pick'of the finest specimens ever to spring from the loins of the Boot. Or something like that.

Oh, forget it. It's nine Italian women we'd gladly make our goomah. Happy?

#9. Giada De Laurentiis
Claim to fame: Putting all kinds of things in her mouth on the Food Network. The sexiest disproportionately large head in all of television.

#8. Elisabetta Canalis
Claim to fame: In Italy, she's a popular TV personality. Here, she's "Lady in Castle" in Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo. We blame the language barrier.

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