Joseline Hernandez, Baby had a bit of a breakthrough on last night’s edition of Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta. For once, she didn’t buy into Stevie J’s bullshit about how he “made” her and that he could wave a magic wand and make Joseline’s newfound career as a television personality and Spanglish rapper disappear. Yes, Joseline was quick to shoot back Stevie J’s “I made you” with “this been done.” Listen, applaud this bad boosh and applaud her now.
For those of us who have watched this show from the very beginning, we recognize what a big step that is for the Puerto Rican Princess.
Maybe she was listening to inspirational rap—i.e. a Nicki Minaj feature or select mixtape tracks—but something spurred her to get some damn perspective. Any man that has gone from producing for Mariah Carey to needing Mona Scott Young to reignite his career shouldn’t be walking around parading himself as Geppetto.
As for what sparked the married-but-maybe-not couple’s tit-for-tat, this other Joseline quote from last night should explain everything: “You married to the baddest bitch you could ever get and you still Facetiming hoes.”
Before their fight over vagina shots in iMessage, the two, along with Benzino and his new boo thang, Althea, were celebrating the opening of their new bar Sleaze and Zino Bistro & Bar. Naturally, since filming there have been questions as to who actually owns this establishment, but whoever owns the place, it looks a lot like Dave & Busters for the people who always get kicked out of Dave & Busters. And before you say “Well, I didn’t see any games!” know that there are plenty of people who don’t go to Dave & Busters to play any damn games. My comparison stands.
Unequally unsurprising was that a fight broke out during the grand opening celebration of the Fred & Barney’s Place For Booze and Buffalo Wings. Althea, obviously ready for her close-up, Mr. DeMille, immediately got catty with Benzino’s ex, Karlie Redd. Althea asks Benzino in front of Karlie, and Erica Dixon (who continues to just be a plus one this season), “She has a new telephone number. Does she have the telephone number?”
Karlie said she had all of Benzino’s numbers and that gave way to the follow-up question, “Did you say you miss Benzino’s dick?” Karlie denied such accusations, quipping, “I don’t gotta miss the dick ‘cause the dick misses me.”
Karlie Redd is in it to win this season, y’all.
Althea says she heard that from Kirk Frost. That all but confirms Kirk’s position as the Peter Thomas of this show—itching so much to be apart of the action at all times that I’m tempted to buy him some Maximum Strength Cortizone 10 Crème. Men gossip, too. Trust.
In any event, Althea threw a drink and Karlie promptly said, “Let that bitch know that I’m crazy.” She threw a drink back and Karlie was thrown out. Meanwhile, Erica confronted Benzino over him calling Karlie a “bitch” and then Althea proceeded to throw a drink at her, too. Not smart. Erica Dixon may give you that “hood girl who works at the bank” vibe, but she will run up on you quick. There’s a reason Scrappy had no problem tagging her into that fight with Stevie and Joseline in previous seasons.
I don’t support wasting alcohol, so I’m not much of a fan of Althea thus far.
Joseline was disgusted by this gross display of violence (yeah, I’m laughing as I type this) and explained, “This is a family business.” Whatever to that and Karlie yelling outside the club, “When Joc get a hold of your ass, I feel sorry for you.”
Speaking of Joc, Karlie is so damn happy to be dating someone who can be Googled even if the results are all from 2008.
In related emotional baggage and beef-filled storylines, The Bambi and Scrappy broke up. We all saw this coming given The Bambi was trying to force feelings on a person who repeatedly told her that she was on Mars while he was chilling at the car wash on MLK. She didn’t take it that well, but oh well. Good luck, girl.
Oh, Kirk doesn’t want Rasheeda to go to New Orleans because he’s selfish, though he’ll likely lose that fight ‘cause they need these VH1 checks. Kirk did win one battle in getting their baby’s pediatrician to co-sign his opinion that her mama shouldn’t be kissing on their newborn son. I wonder if they can find a doctor to tell Kirk not to be kissing on other woman's lips -- all four of them.
Aside from the typical trash, the show had what was probably its most sincere and thoughtful moment in Deb Antney tackling the suicide of her youngest son, Caodes “Kayo Redd” Scott. It was very hard to watch initially because Deb was trying to discuss the death with Waka Flocka, only to see him leave as he told his mom, “This conversation is crazy, Debra. Your boy can’t do that. Your boy can’t handle that.”
Neither could his fiancé because she left Deb, too.
I understand death is a difficult subject for most, but to watch a mom be abandoned while grieving her son’s death felt very…cold. Deb attributed his death to numerous things. She acknowledged that he battled with the loss of his vision and living in the shadows of both she and Waka. She also admitted that Kayo discussed his death the night before, only she didn’t take him as seriously as she perhaps should have.
Later, though, she said she checked her son’s computer to discover how “hard” he went to defend his family against critics online. That resulted in a PSA where Deb claimed “I find the Internet to be the murder capital of the world.” The PSA was calling on people to pledge No R.I.P. or Reckless Internet Posting.
I say this with great sensitivity: While I do understand the power of the Internet, the cruelty of many who consume it, and the effort to bring attention to a societal ill. But, perhaps the greater discussion needs to be had about depression and mental illness and how Black men in particular confront that.
That aside, I feel for Deb, especially when she said, “I miss my son, my friend.” May he rest in peace.
P.S. Oh, I forgot Mimi and Nikko are still there. Mimi’s new manager, a.k.a. Joseline’s old booker, called them a “power couple” and “Atlanta’s adult entertainment couple.” HAHAHAHAHAHA. In the confessional, Mimi pretended to be offended by all of this. Mimi makes Madea look like Meryl Streep.
Also, Nikko is like the Jason Derulo of reality television.
Michael Arceneaux is from the land of Beyoncé, but now lives in the city of Master Splinters. Follow him at @youngsinick.
