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January 06, 2018

United Flight Makes Emergency Landing After Passenger Smears Feces All Over Bathrooms

A United flight on its way from Chicago to Hong Kong was grounded after one of the passengers decided to repaint one of the bathroom walls with a fresh coat of his own shit. The poop-palmed perpetrator forced United Airlines flight 895 to stop its 16-hour flight after the passenger was observed not only smearing the fun surprise all over the bathroom's walls but also trying to stuff his shirt down the toilet; likely in a bid to clog it. The flight then had to be redirected to Anchorage, Alaska - hours off-course from where they were supposed to be headed. 

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