10 Lies All Sneakerheads Tell Themselves

These are the 10 lies every sneakerhead tells themselves.

Oct 27, 2014
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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

Behind every sneakerhead is a talented liar. Every Saturday morning, they quiet the voice of reason telling them to spend their money responsibly. It's a constant psychological battle, and so long as 'heads are living and breathing sneaker culture, they'll always give in. Whether it's to save face over an L or to justify a purchase that they know they weren't supposed to make, sneakerheads always know how to bend the truth when it comes to feeding their addiction. With that being said, these are the 10 Lies All Sneakerheads Tell Themselves.

 

I can make this size fit.

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What You Really Mean: I camped out overnight only to have my true size go to the kid in front of me. I’d be a fool to leave empty-handed now. I’m leaving here with a pair to trade or resell. Besides, there’s always demand for a size 14, right?

This will be my last pair.

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What You Really Mean: I just spent my entire paycheck with a click of a mouse, and need to get my girlfriend (or wife or mom) off my back. I’m basically telling you what you want to hear. Last pair of sneakers? Right. Retiring from the game? Sureeeeee.

I NEED these sneakers.

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What You Really Mean: I can wear a different pair of sneakers every day for an entire year. Food and shelter? Yeah, those are real needs. Sneakers? Definitely not a need. Not since elementary school. Everything I cop now is basically because of FOMO.

I really do like how these sneakers look.

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What You Really Mean: I like these sneakers because everyone else likes them.

I'd still cop this collaboration even if it was a general release.

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What You Really Mean: I only buy sneakers if they're a collaboration or if they're a limited drop. No Supreme branding? Forget those Air Force 1s. Available at the mall? I’ll pass on the SBs.

I don't use sneakers to impress others.

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What You Really Mean: I'm constantly refreshing my Instagram feed after posting an on-foot shot to see if this would finally be the one that breaks 100 likes.

This is going to be an easy cop.

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What You Really Mean: I entered 10 local raffles, hit up 3 sneaker connects, turned on Twitter notifications, and purchased a bot. I GOT THIS... RIGHT?

Well, that's money I can use towards something else.

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What You Really Mean: I had a feeling I’d strike out on this release. Good thing I saved up extra to cop from a reseller.

I wear all my sneakers.

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What You Really Mean: Yeah, that's right. I wear all my sneakers...the ones I don't plan on reselling, that is. Or the ones I cop and just add to the "I'll-get-to-those pile."

I hate resellers.

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What You Really Mean: I'm just bitter I couldn't cop the sneakers. If I had the opportunity to make three times as much as retail price, even at the expense of my sneakerhead morals, I’d join this particular group of scum in a drop of a dime. And besides, HOW ELSE WOULD I COP THAT MISSED RELEASE? 

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