Whether he's slowing drivers down or nearly plowing through a crowd of pedestrians, this douche thinks he and his fixed-gear bike own the road. When he isn't busy doing that, he's talking about his bike incessantly, totally clueless to the fact that he's being tuned out. However, years of riding up Northwest 14th Street's incline have transformed his physique from Shaggy to Groundskeeper Willie, thus fueling his fixed-gear megalomania. Though there's an angry driver out there waiting to bust him in the grill with his bike lock, his ghost would only haunt the D.C. streets, continuing to talk about nothing but his bike.
2. Dingy shirt
3. Bike, obviously
4. Rolled-up pants leg
Related Douche: The Skate Rat Douche