Want to get laughed out by police officers? Be a grown man who calls them to complain, saying that a 5'2" 130 pound woman assaulted you with a shoe. According to the Washington Examiner, a man phoned authorities early Sunday morning claiming that he was attacked by a woman with a shoe outside of the nightclub Ibiza in Northeast D.C. 

The man claims that the woman hit him in the head with a shoe. This is precisely why people can't have nice things—like red bottoms. Also, this type of activity has no effect on Ibiza's reputation as one of D.C.'s douchiest establishments.

[via DCist]

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