The Orphan, a horror movie about an adoption gone wrong, hits theaters today. And while we here at Complex love the kids (not in a R. Kelly or Woody Allen way or anything) we have no tolerance for children that act up and act out.
We were raised in a time when we caught a quick back hand if we stepped out of line. Ah, the good ol' days. But while Hollywood loves making movies about disgruntled adolescents, we find the craziest kids are found outside of Hollywood, and, for some reason, on YouTube. Keep reading to see 5 of the worst behaved children in the world, and be thankful none of them belong to you...
KID: Great White Nightmare.
EVIL OFFENSE: Use of the N-bomb...amongst other things.
PUNISHMENT WE'D INSTITUTE:Five years as Remy Ma's personal assistant with duties including, manicures, pedicures, eyebrow and Brazilian waxing, as well as the reading of Papoose's sexually tinged love letters.
KID: Broad Street Bully
EVIL OFFENSE: Berating his mother for a glass of chocolate milk.
PUNISHMENT WE'D INSTITUTE: Having to drink Rick Ross's chocolate milk. Ayo!
KID: Marlboro Tyke
EVIL OFFENSE: Underage smoking.
PUNISHMENT WE'D INSTITUTE: For this one, we believe the blame falls upon the parents' shoulders. Therefore, we'd nub their fingers and put a hole in their trachea.
KID: Fat Kid with PMS.
EVIL OFFENSE: Domestic abuse against his mother. And by domestic abuse, we mean slapping his mom across the face on live television.
PUNISHMENT WE'D INSTITUTE: Noah obviously needs all types of help: he needs to join a fat camp, he needs some sort of father figure, he needs to learn how to slap better—we sentence him to five months on tour with Chris Brown.
KID: Latarian Milton
EVIL OFFENSE: Doing hoodrat things with his friends.
PUNISHMENT WE'D INSTITUTE: This kid's alright with us. Yo, Latarian, we got some spots opening up for fall internships here at the 'Plex. Holla!
Bradley July 24th, 2009 at 06:22 PM
LATARIAN!
michael July 24th, 2009 at 10:58 PM
you forgot King Curtis from wife swap. He's a like a combo of latarian and the fat kid who slaps his mom aka hilarity: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xh79kWhxBh8
michaelwho? July 25th, 2009 at 12:22 AM
this is waaaay too funny... probably one of the best posts since that ne-yo jim jones twitter thing haha
T. Washington July 26th, 2009 at 12:06 AM
Damn that fat kid putting his hands on his moms like that. He would have been takin a dirt nap in my house. that was lolzy as hell
deadfatkid July 26th, 2009 at 03:37 AM
oh MY that fatass woulda gotten his shit WRECKED if he ever did that round my house. im debating finding his cryin pussy ass right now just to beat some fuckin manhood into his mantitties.
swizzy July 26th, 2009 at 04:45 PM
did that xbox kid call his mom a bitty? lolz
kat July 27th, 2009 at 12:19 PM
oh wow to that first video she needs to help
kat July 27th, 2009 at 12:20 PM
Typo....."she needs to get help"
officer duscrom July 28th, 2009 at 12:11 AM
fucking dead at... "rick ross's chocolate milk. ayo!"
Jen September 2nd, 2009 at 10:40 AM
You forgot that little blonde seven year old in Utah who stole his parents' car to avoid going to church. BUTT-WHOOPING WELL EARNED.