If I had a dime for every time a member of the GOP publicly admitted they were a misogynist, I'd have retired years ago. Too bad there's no such reward system, because a Republican Senate candidate just said he wanted to “come home to a home cooked dinner every night at six” when asked if he supported women’s rights. Here that, ladies? It’s time to put down whatever device you’re reading this on and grab an apron.

In a statement shared via Facebook Tuesday night, Missouri candidate Courtland Sykes explained his 1950s approach to gender relations. “In light of recent questions regarding my views on Women's Rights, attached is my full statement," he posted to his official campaign Facebook page, as CBS News points out. 

Sykes opens the statement by saying his fiancée, Chanel Rion, has given him orders to favor women’s rights, but his “obedience” comes with a price. “I want to come home to a home-cooked dinner at six every night,” he writes. “One that she fixes and one that I expect one day to have daughters learn to fix after they become traditional homemakers and family wives—think Norman Rockwell here and Gloria Steinem be damned.”

But he doesn’t stop there! Sykes then goes in on feminists, calling them snakes and banshees. Yeah, banshees. FYI, the dictionary definition of “banshee” is “a female spirit whose wailing warns of an impending death in a house.” Cute.

"I don't buy into radical feminism's crazed definition of modern womanhood and I never did. They made it up to suit their own nasty, snake-filled heads,” he writes. "I want daughters to have their own intelligence, their own dignity, their own workspace and their own degrees; I want them to build home-based enterprises and live in homes shared with good husbands and I don't want them to grew up into career-obsessed banshees who forgo home life and children and the happiness of family to become nail-biting, manophonic, hell-bent feminist she devils who shriek from the tops of a thousand tall buildings they are think [sic] they could have leaped over in a single bound—had men not [been] 'suppressing them.' It's just nuts."

There’s a lot to unpack here, especially the part about “nail-biting, manophonic, hell-bent feminist she devils,” but unfortunately as Sykes argues, that’s above my pay grade. Read the full bonkers statement for yourself below.