10 Reasons You Should Never Take Financial Advice From a Sneakerhead
Don't spend it if you got it.
Image via Complex Original
Being a sneakerhead isn't a lifestyle or hobby for people who hate spending money. There are always sneakers you can come-up on for cheap, but getting your favorite sneakers usually means shelling out a ton of cash. With all the money sneakerheads are dealing with on a regular basis, you'd think they'd know a thing or two about balancing their finances. But, nope, they suck at it.
If a sneakerhead were to advise you on how to spend, save, or invest your money, you'd be bankrupt within a week. It's not their fault, they're passionate about sneakers. But they could afford to take a money-management class or two. If you go to do your taxes next year, and your accountant has a pair of Space Jams on, walk the other way. Here are 10 Reasons You Should Never Take Financial Advice From a Sneakerhead.
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They buy things even when they know the quality sucks.
People bitch and moan about how much the quality on sneakers sucks, but they still buy them. We can't explain how twisted the logic in this is. If something isn't up to your standards, leave it alone. This is like shopping with beer goggles. "Hey, the sneaker only has three creases in it, and I haven't worn it." Put the Jordans back on the shelf.
They buy multiple pairs of a sneaker they'll never wear.
If one thing is for certain, sneakers will always get retrored. Stocking up on seven pairs of Neon Air Max 95s or Jordan XIIIs seemed like good logic when the sneakers came back out, but a few years later, the sneakers dropped again. There was no need for you to put yourself in a financial rut because you wanted to wear a pair of sneakers for the "rest of your life." The next thing you know, three years have gone by, and now you're wearing boots everyday and you're inundated with a lifetime supply of something you may never sport again.
They see a crazy amount of value in things no one else cares about.
We get it, you fucking love sneakers. That doesn't mean everyone else does. Seeing an exuberant amount of value in something that no else does is what makes a collector a collector. It also means that you'd tell someone they should drop serious cash on something that they don't have interest in because it has an inflated value. This is like giving someone advice that they should invest in baseball cards when they could care less about sports. Sneakers are only worth their hype values to other sneakerheads. Your dad won't give you $300 for your Air Jordan IVs, unless he's Jerry Seinfeld.
They invested in Nike SBs like Beanie Babies.
The most ridiculous thing that sneakerheads invested in was the Nike SB phase. At this point, there are more similarities between Nike SBs and Beanie Babies than there aren't. They all have nicknames, came in insane color schemes, and haven't retained their value over the years. If you have a pair of deadstock Supreme His, those are worth something. But plenty of people have a closet full of Mork and Mindys, the Three Little Bears pack, and Day of the Deads that they're, unfortunately, stuck with. So much for copping sneakers for $200 that you were going to flip someday.
They don't diversify.
Anyone worth their salt in the financial world will tell you this: Diversify your portfolio. What they mean is, you don't put all of your eggs in one basket--or spend your money on one thing. Sneakerheads rarely see the bigger picture and cop just sneakers, and sometimes one type of sneaker. (Jordan heads, we see you.)
You need to expand your horizons. Spend your money on different things. Yes, you can cop the flyest kicks, but the only thing you spend your money on shouldn't come from Nike. When was the last time you took your girl out for dinner?
Why would someone campout for sneakers for days and not go to work?
When a hot sneaker comes out, people have to stand in line for it. Sometimes, they even need to campout. This means they're spending more of their time--and potentially earned money--on getting one pair of sneakers. You think you might be spending $160 on a pair of Retro Air Jordans, but when you have to stand in line for three days, how much is it really costing you?
If you really, really need the sneakers, then we understand your dire urge to make the purchase by any means necessary. But if you're trying to come-up on some extra cash by selling the sneakers, there's a high probability that half the people in the line are doing the same thing. The market is already flooded, and you might have been better off just buying the sneakers on eBay when all things are considered.
Spending money because of the fear of missing out.
How many times have you heard about someone copping a pair of sneakers just because it was the last pair? It could even be something that weren't planning on purchasing, but because of the perceived rareness and scarcity, they just needed to have the sneakers. That's like going to deli and seeing one buffalo chicken sandwich left on the shelf and buying it. You might hate buffalo chicken, and there's a great chance that others have touched and handled the last one left before deciding not to cop. You shouldn't spend money because of the fear of missing out.
They buy sneakers just because of hype.
Everyone says that they buy what they like, but sneakerheads are always guilty of being suckered by hype. They let others convince them to spend money when they don't really need to. This is peer pressure at its finest. Except, instead of chugging a bottle of hot sauce like you did in 8th grade, you're now $220 lighter in the pocket and the proud owner of a pair of Foamposites.
Sneakerheads spend money based on their emotions.
Sneakerheads love to buy sneakers they remember as a kid. You hear it all the time: "Oh, I have to have those, I had them back in third grade." That's right, you had them back in third grade, and you're now in the second year of getting your masters degree. Spending money based on emotions instead of with your head is one of the most foolish things you can do.
Let's be honest, no one really ever sells their sneakers.
Have you ever watched a show like American Pickers and saw the old guy that doesn't want to sell any of his "valuables"? That's how sneakerheads act, too. Sure, we've all bought sneakers and thought, "I'm going to sell all of these when they're worth something." But that day never comes, and you now have to spend money renting out a storage unit. You not only lost money on selling your kicks, you're actually spending money just to hold your sneakers.