This one is a chameleon of sorts, disappearing into many different shapes and sizes in the vortex of Trader Joe’s. It could be any person in this photo. Maybe the over-enthused soccer mom, or the part-time nanny from Trinidad, or even the (possible) silver fox playing with his backpack in the checkout line.

They seem nice enough, but beware. If they find out that you personally stood in the way of an extra deal, you will die from a terrible death of painfully awkward eye contact and passive aggressive body language. They stalk the customer service counter waiting to pounce on the next unsuspecting sales associate. Those sprouts in their hand were not up to par, good sir in the Hawaiian shirt, and they want their money back