If you’re a healthy male (or female), you’ve probably got a fantasy or two rolling around in your skull that you’ve never voiced. In 2013, let a few of the bad boys tumble out of your mouth without shame.

Most confident, sexually secure women will not be threatened by your dirty daydreams, even if they verge towards filthy. Start by asking her to reveal something she’s into she’s never spoken aloud. Take turns confessing to your freakiest fantasies and take each one of them for a test drive.

Two things to keep in mind: Keep things judgement free (nothing should be described as weird or abnormal) and never admit to any desires involving a real-life (as in, non-celebrity) person. The quickest way to bring things to a halt is to say you’ve always wanted to see her sister sans clothing.