10 Reasons Why We Hope The World Really Will End This Friday

There will be no hangover after we go H.A.M. Thursday night.

Come Thursday evening, streets all across the world will be jam-packed with drunken stumblers, thirsty partygoers, and horny people ready to bang the night away. OK, so that's more wishful thinking than reality, but with the (slim) possibility that everything we know will cease to exist by Friday morning, Thursday seems like the perfect time to indulge in all of those vices that, on any other day, would send you to prison.

Around here, the bottles will be popped and strong beverages will be a-flowing by about 5 p.m. EST. From there, toasts shall be made and the town shall be painted red. And, yes, there's a chance of incarceration. So, hell yeah, we'll be keeping our fingers crossed for armageddon—waking up in a jail cell without any hope of parole is worse than not waking up at all.

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