Careful Conan! A History of FOX's Late-Night TV Failures

Rupert Murdoch's network is trying to pry Conan O'Brien from NBC. Hopefully he's aware of the network's long-forgotten bricks.

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Conan O'Brien is being hunted by a FOX.

Wily FOX execs have watched with glee as inept NBC suits have alienated late night host Conan O'Brien. Six years ago, FOX tried to pry O'Brien away from NBC by reportedly offering to triple his salary if he'd switch networks, but he stayed because execs promised he'd soon inherit The Tonight Show, late night's most illustrious gig, from Jay Leno. Now, less than a year since the poofy-haired redhead took over, the NBC peacock is showing its true colors, trying to push The Tonight Show back to 12:05 a.m. (a.k.a. tomorrow motherfuckin' morning) so Leno, who failed miserably in prime time, can slide back into the 11:35 p.m. slot. FOX is nipping at O'Brien again, and there's a chance the network may land the star simply because he wants to be treated like one.

Though we're sure O'Brien could deliver laughs anywhere, we're a bit skeptical about Rupert Murdoch's network, which has done late night right only rarely. To see why we're concerned for Conan should he make the switch, check out a history of FOX's late-night fails...

Fox_Late_Show_Rivers

THE LATE SHOW STARRING JOAN RIVERS, 1986-1987
• The former fill-in for Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show ruined their relationship with the god of late-night talk shows by secretly dipping out to do her own show without his blessing. Her face was lifted, but ratings steadily sagged.

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Fox_Late_Show

THE LATE SHOW, 1987-1988
• After Joan Rivers left the show, FOX shortened the title and kept it moving with a rotating cast of hosts that included Suzanne Somers, Richard Belzer, Robert Townsend, and Arsenio Hall, who was actually a hit in a 13-week trial. He left to make movie money with Eddie Murphy, though, and ratings plummeted as unknowns comedians Jeff Joseph and John Mulrooney, then Seattle TV personality Ross Shafer, gave it a shot. It should tell you something that David Spade reportedly turned down the opportunity to be one of the rotating hosts after Rivers. Ouch.

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Fox_Wilton_North

THE WILTON NORTH REPORT, 1987-1988
• Execs passed on potential hosts Rosie O'Donnell and Ellen Degeneres and hired Phil Cowan and Paul Robins, annoying Sacramento morning drive-time DJs who had no TV experience. In a backwards move, FOX had hired a writing staff before considering the on-screen talent, and the radio heads never vibed with the people putting words in their mouths. Coincidentally, young Conan O'Brien was one of those writers. Can't say he had no idea what goes on at FOX.

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Fox_Arsenio

THE ARSENIO HALL SHOW, 1989-1994
• Until Arsenio pissed off advertisers by inviting controversial Nation of Islam leader Louis Farrakhan on as a guest, his show, which catered to young people and minority viewers, was successful and important. Who could forget when Arsenio had then presidential candidate Bill Clinton play the sax? Were it not for Linda Tripp, that might've been the blowjob he's best known for! Woof! Woof! Woof!

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Fox_Chevy_Chase2

THE CHEVY CHASE SHOW, 1993
• In the so-called "Talk-Show Wars," Chase's show was a non-combatant. Not for lack of shots fired, mind you (see the poster above going at Letterman), but because Chase, who used cheap pratfalls for laughs and recycled material despite the fact that his show only lasted five weeks, shot blanks.

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Fox_MadTV

MADTV, 1995-2009
• Debuting back when SNL sucked hardest, this garbage sketch comedy "rival" with second- and third-rate comedians managed to suck even more. If you ask us, it should've been called MadShittyTV.

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Fox_Magic

THE MAGIC HOUR, 1998-1999
• When it came to basketball, Earvin Johnson was Magic. When it came to reading cue cards and making small talk with guests, he was the Adam Morrison of that shit.

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Fox_Wanda_Sykes

THE WANDA SYKES SHOW, 2009-present
• This replacement for MadTV features Sykes and comedian sidekick Keith Robinson doing sketches and interviews with people like Jenna Jameson. We're not staying in on Saturday to watch it, but hey, at least it ain't Magic.

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• THE TOP 100 TV SHOWS OF THE 2000's

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