A peacock walks into a liquor store. No, it's not the beginning of a terrible joke.
A peacock with "expensive taste" waltzed into a Los Angeles County-area liquor store this week with no discernible intention of actually purchasing anything, the Associated Pressreported with glee Wednesday. Instead, the peacock destroyed approximately $500 worth of the shop's finest offerings. So it goes.
Royal Oaks Liquor Store manager Rani Ghanem was first alerted to the peacock's presence by a customer. After he attempted to lead the peacock back outside, the bird relocated to the top of a shelf. "Yeah, [the peacock]'s got expensive taste," Ghanem said of the incident, which occurred Monday in Arcadia. "I'm like, 'You break, you buy, dude.'"
An animal control officer later responded to the scene. "He was trying to get it with the fishing net, and [the peacock] jumped on the first wine bottle," Ghanem said. "When that happened, I was like, 'Aw, this is about to be a big mess.' He tried to get it again with the net... It just went straight diving into all the bottles." In short, the peacock broke but did not buy.
After about 90 minutes inside the shop, the unharmed peacock was freed from the burdens of commercialized alcohol consumption. In this peacock's honor, we must now listen to Katy Perry's underrated Teenage Dream cut "Peacock." Please enjoy responsibly.