Let me start by saying that I am in no way an expert at marijuana or marijuana ingestion devices. Until recently, I didn't even like smoking pot much at all—it tends to make me anxious, paranoid, and generally uncomfortable. Maybe I'm just not "chill" enough, but the stereotypes of relaxed stoners always seemed totally different than the actual experience of getting high. You know that recurring dream where you're still in college, it's the end of the semester, and you realize you haven't been to class once? That's the feeling that pot tends to give me, only about everything ever in life. Even so, if I happen to be at my house with absolutely no responsibilities, secure in the knowledge I won't have to interact with anyone else or talk to my family on the phone, it can be nice alternative cracking open a beer. That, and I just got Mario Kart 8, which, for whatever reason, seems to have made smoking pot way more fun lately. But regardless of my past fraught relationship with marijuana, when Grenco Science contacted me asking if I'd like to review their new Snoop Dogg-endorsed line of G Pens, of course I agreed. These are my highly scientific findings:
Snoop Dogg | G Pen Herbal™
Packaging: The first thing I notice about the Snoop Dogg G Pen Herbal™ is the packaging. The box has a matte finish that's similar to a nice paperback book. Rather than make me think about crunchy stoners with Tibetan scarf wall art, the G Pen looks like latest Apple device. After fumbling with it for a few seconds, I realize that it swings across the top, revealing the vaporizer nestled in a plastic housing. I find myself wishing the box glowed like the briefcase from Pulp Fiction, but unfortunately it's just a cooler-than-normal package without any metaphysical properties as far as I can tell.
Contents: 1 Rechargeable Snoop Dogg | G Pen Battery™, 1 Snoop Dogg | G Pen Herbal Tank™, 1 G Pen USB Charger™, 1 G Wall Adapter™, 3 G Cleaning Tips™, 1 G Cleaning Brush™, 2 G Glass Sleeves™, 1 Snoop Dogg | G Pen Beach Towel*
Assembly and Looks: The G Pen itself is designed with a blue map pattern featuring Long Beach, California streets, which makes sense considering Snoop hails from the LBC. Like the box it came in, the pen has a rubbery finish that's nice to touch and has a expensive-feeling weight to it. After putting together the device and charging the battery using the Rechargeable Snoop Dogg G Pen Battery™, I load the G Pen Herbal Tank™ about half full with some three-week-old weed I bought from my friend's cousin who goes to NYU. As suggested by the directions, I make sure to first grind the pot so that it properly vaporizes. Then I use the G Cleaning Brush™ to mash down the weed, and pop the top mouthpiece part back on. To turn on G Pen, you need to press the power button five times, which sounds like a lot of times to press a button. But, then again, you don't want the G Pen to turn on in your pocket, do you?
Smoking: The actual smoking part works really well, which is great because that’s the whole point of this device. I press the button, hold, and inhale. It feels relatively smooth in my lungs, if a little bit harder to breathe in than if I were smoking out of a regular pipe. Still, when I exhale, there is a large plume of smoke and it smells like weed. Success! I wait a few seconds, then hit it again to similar result. I know it's been effective, because I've just realized that this review is due tomorrow and have started to feel very stressed out about writing it.
Final Thoughts: The Snoop Dogg | G Pen Herbal is a well-built device that does what it says it will. Unlike past G Pens, you can smoke actual weed out of it rather than just wax. It feels good in the hand, has a nice aesthetic to it, and comes with a bunch of cool extras. Though I've only used it once, it’s much better than an apple. 5/5 Doggs.
Price: $84.95
*I did not receive a beach towel with my review model, so cannot attest to the quality of said towel or how it aides the vaporizing process. (Perhaps it's so you can put it under the door in your dorm room so you don't get busted smoking pot by your RA.) Still, pretty cool–you can never have enough beach towels, right?
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Snoop Dogg | microG Herbal™
Packaging: No surprises here. The packaging for the microG™ is almost identical to the other pen. Both the pen and extras are displayed in a similar way, with the pen on top of all the other goodies. The charging cable inside is noticeably shorter, but I can't forsee this being a problem. I should also note that the microG Herbal™ is the only one of the three Snoop Dogg G Pens to include 5 microG Mouthpiece Sleeves™. Presumably, these are so you don't get cooties when sharing the pen, but seem to go against the to the whole "pass the doobie to the left" stoner philosophy.
Contents: 1 Rechargeable Snoop Dogg | microG Battery™, 3 microG Herbal Tanks™, 1 Snoop Dogg | microG Herbal Tank Mouthpiece™, 5 microG Mouthpiece Sleeves™, 1 G Keychain with microG Tool™ 1 G Wall Adapter™, 1 microG Wired USB Charger, 5-Pin™ 3 G Cleaning Tips™, 1 Snoop Dogg | G Pen Beach Towel
Assembly: The microG, like its big brother, is also easy to assemble. The first thing I notice is that the microG Herbal Tanks™ are much smaller than the G Pen Herbal Tank™. This was to be expected, but it seems better suited to smoking wax than actual herbs, though Grenco Science assures you that it's equally adept for both. According to Snoop, "When I partnered with Grenco Science, I wanted to make sure that my 'Double G Series' made the vaporizing experience simple and easy. My Snoop Dogg | microG Herbal represents that and is perfect for on-the-go." Who knows if Snoop actually said those words, but it's definitely quite a bit smaller than the full-sized version.
Smoking: Though I just smoked actual dried weed in the regular version, I decide to try both weed and wax this time. I first go for some West Coast Cure, which a friend brought back from California. I scoop a dab into the canister and go through the same motions as before, pressing the button five times to turn it on. Again, I hold the button to hit it and breathe in. It worked again perfectly, but now my immediate concern is that I really don't want to smoke any more. I'm feeling a little bit woozy and I consider turning on my Wii U, reconsider, and press on. I fill the second container with regular pot, screw it into place, and take a mini hit. It seems to work just like before, though it only holds a small amount of weed in chamber.
Final Thoughts: Despite the smaller size, the microG works as advertised. There's definitely less room for actual plant material in this one, but the smaller size has its upsides. 5/5 Doggs.
Price: $84.95
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Snoop Dogg | G Pen Travel Kit™
Packaging: The G Pen Travel is the baby-sized version of Snoop Dogg's G Pen line. Rather than coming in a nice box, it's packaged in a plastic card-sized case for convenience. While I miss the highbrow look of the other devices, it makes sense considering the selling point of this one is its portability.
Contents: 1 Rechargeable G Pen Battery™, 1 G Pen Coil™, 1 G Pen Wireless USB Charger™, 1 G Pen Travel Case™ (Universal)**
Assembly: Definitely the easiest of the bunch, the G Pen Travel™ device just requires you to charge it and screw it together. The device itself is made out of slick black plastic—no cool Long Beach streets or rubbery texture. Compared with the other two, it definitely feels cheaper, which of course it is. I should also note that this device can only be used for "essential oils"—if you don't smoke wax, you're SOL unfortunately.
Smoking: I load the G Pen Coil™ with wax, tap the button five times, and hit it. It works just like the mini and micro.
Final Thoughts: Compared to the microG™ and the G Pen Herbalç the build quality definitely feels less robust. That said, it works, and its small size make it a great option for the wax smoker on the go. If you can drop the extra cash, I'd say go for the microG for its herbal option, but if you only smoke oil then the G Pen Travel™ could be for you. 3/5 Doggs. Now, if you'll please excuse me, I'm going to lie down.
Price: $69.95
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Nathan Reese is a News Editor at Complex Pop Culture who prefers dry martinis over getting uncomfortably stoned. He tweets here.
