George Lucas’ 10 Most Obnoxious Moments

During the ‘80s, Hollywood got caught up in a bit of a controversy when the Copyright holders on classic films took it upon themselves to colorize black-and-white movies in an attempt to make them more modern. However, there was a group of filmmakers at the time so staunchly against this movement that they went to Congress in an attempt to have these classic films preserved respectfully and properly. This eventually led to the National Film Registry, which is still in charge of taking historically significant films and keeping them the way we remember.

The ironic part is that George Lucas was one of the filmmakers that made an impassioned speech to Congress about this matter. He claimed the people changing these films for their own gain were “barbarians” and that this was a crime against the culture of humanity. Fast forward nine years, however, as Lucas would go on to make countless changes to his original Star Wars trilogy by adding lines of dialogue, extra special effects shots, and even a CGI rock band. We would say this is like the pot calling the kettle black, but we’re afraid Lucas would just get his team at ILM (Industrial Light & Magic) to change the color of the pot.

George Lucas doesn’t do many televised interviews anymore, so when he went on The Daily Show in early 2010, fans were eager to see what he had to say about his recent films. Instead of acknowledging any of the prequels’ shortcomings, though, The Flannel One smugly stated that older Star Wars fans are simply too nostalgic to enjoy the new trilogy.

So, in Lucas’ opinion, nostalgia is the reason why people hated Jar Jar Binks and groaned when it was revealed that Padmé died “of a broken heart." Seriously, a broken heart. No, it wasn’t the fault of the sub-par scripts or vaguely racist characters; it was the fans’ fault that they didn't like these movies. Crafty move, Mr. Lucas.

There was a time when the word “special” in special effects really meant something. They were used sparingly in order to get the audience’s attention and provide some serious eye candy for the movie’s trailers and commercials. Evidently no one told George Lucas that when filming the prequels, because he made it his mission statement to put CGI in every scene in order to make his movies as artificial-looking as possible.

Everything that the original trilogy did with practical effects, Lucas did with hokey CGI in the prequels. There were CGI aliens, spaceships, clothing, and even fruit; that’s right, apparently regular fruit didn’t fit in with Lucas’ vision of ruining Star Wars. And then there was the copious amount of green-screen thrown into every shot just to give every scene that Playstation 2 look that every movie needs. He turned a once convincing world that audiences marveled at into a digital nightmare that completely removed us from the story.

George Lucas is right about one thing: Hollywood doesn’t typically invest a lot of money into films with predominantly black casts; however, in a recent interview, he went on a bit of a self-indulgent rant that made him seem more crazy than compassionate.

In an interview with USA Today, Lucas stated, "I realize that by accident I've now put the black film community at risk (with Red Tails, whose $58 million budget far exceeds typical all-black productions). I'm saying, if this doesn't work, there's a good chance you'll stay where you are for quite a while. It'll be harder for you guys to break out of that (lower-budget) mold. But if I can break through with this movie, then hopefully there will be someone else out there saying let's make a prequel and sequel, and soon you have more Tyler Perrys out there."

Forget about the success of Spike Lee, and to a lesser extent John Singleton, and let’s ignore the fact that Denzel Washington and Will Smith are in $100 million blockbusters seemingly every year. While there's no doubt that Hollywood does an awful job of presenting all races equally, we are in no way going to turn George Lucas into Rosa Parks.

One of the biggest pieces of pop culture news from the past week was George Lucas' announcement that he's retiring from blockbuster filmmaking, thus ending his involvement in any future Star Wars movies. But he’s not leaving a galaxy far, far away because of boredom or age; instead, he’s leaving because of angry fanboys everywhere.

When asked about Star Wars’ future, Lucas told The New York Times, “Why would I make any more when everybody yells at you all the time and says what a terrible person you are?”

We bet he doesn’t hate the fans that much when he’s prancing around his ranch in a tuxedo made of $100 bills. It’s a shame he didn’t come to this conclusion after releasing Return Of The Jedi.

Think about it: You've just been horribly burned and scarred by your best friend, you're on life-support, and you just found out that you accidentally killed your pregnant wife. Would you just stand there with arms spread and shout, “Noooooooooo!” when you got the news? Apparently that’s what George Lucas thinks is the proper response because that’s exactly what happens in what should have been the best scene in Revenge Of The Sith.

Fans had been waiting decades to see the birth of Darth Vader, and instead of acting like the cold, homicidal cyborg that we all know and love, he acts like an irrational emo kid who's just been told that Thursday is breaking up. Really, who just stands there shouting, “Nooooooo!”? That’s the type of reaction one would have after discovering they got the wrong order at McDonalds, not after you found out that your wife and unborn children were dead.

When a fourth Indiana Jones was announced, action fans everywhere were salivating at the thought of another whip-wielding adventure starring a geriatric Harrison Ford. But then the warning signs started to trickle in, like Shia LaBeouf getting cast in a role and the prospect of aliens appearing during the film's climax. However, most fans had faith in George Lucas to shed the negative opinions of the Star Wars prequels by delivering a return to form for Indiana Jones.

Unfortunately, 2008's Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull didn’t even come close to being a good movie. Between CGI gophers and monkeys, and the infamous “nuke the fridge” incident, the movie turned out to be two hours of pure devastation as audiences witnessed the final nail in Lucas’ cinematic coffin. And although Steven Spielberg was the movie's director, in recent interviews he freely admits that the story was all Lucas.

We were perfectly fine with never knowing that Hayden Christensen existed, but when George Lucas cast him as Anakin Skywalker in Episodes II and III of the Star Wars prequels, the world was forced to endure his wooden acting and painfully awkward facial expressions for over four hours. Christensen’s lack of acting talent made every frame that he appeared in uncomfortable to sit through as he fumbled his way through ill-timed dramatic pauses and romantic scenes that didn’t even rival a pre-pubescent grammar school’s rendition of Romeo & Juliet.

Lucas is infamous for his lack of understanding when it comes to the art of acting; in fact, his only words of advice to Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, and Carrie Fisher during the filming of the first Star Wars movie were to read their lines “faster and more intense.”

And because of Lucas’ ignorance on the subject, millions of fans were left shell-shocked after hearing Christensen spout pick-up lines like this one from Attack Of The Clones, “I don't like sand, it's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth." And yes, Lucas wrote that garbage.

Most people don’t know this, but there is in fact a “cinema hell” for folks who have committed great crimes against film to toil for all eternity. Fatty Arbuckle is there, the producers of Speed II: Cruise Control will be there, and there's also a seat reserved for George Lucas. It’s not for delivering subpar Star Wars prequels or a terrible Indiana Jones movie, because the positives in his career far outweigh those atrocities; no, he will be going there solely for the creation of Jar Jar Binks.

In several interviews, Lucas claimed the ideas for Star Wars came to him in his dreams, including his inspiration for Darth Maul. If that's true, then we have no idea what he was tripping on when he dreamed up this talking Rastafarian fish. While Episode I was bad enough, the fact that Jar Jar got so much screen time should have been a crime against the Geneva Conventions.

We understand he was only supposed to be comic relief, but Jar Jar wound up traumatizing an entire generation of moviegoers with his grating voice and disgraceful one-liners. And the madness didn’t stop at just the movies. Jar Jar also tainted a countless number of kids’ toys, T-shirts, and bed sheets, as well as a bizarre candy tongue that encouraged children to basically spend their day French kissing him. We’re assuming Lucas has one every night before he goes to sleep.

It’s obvious that the original Star Wars trilogy holds a special place in the hearts of movie fans everywhere. Anytime you enter a theater during blockbuster season, it’s evident that the young filmmakers today grew up watching the Death Star trench run, the Battle for Hoth, and the speeder bike chase through Endor in awe. That’s why Lucas’ constant changing of the original movies' gets us so riled up.

In 1997, he started releasing these so-called “Special Editions” by including gaudy CGI shots and extra scenes into all three episodes. We could live with small changes like that, but most recently he added Darth Vader’s infamous “No!” to the ending of Return Of The Jedi almost as a way to stick it to fans who complained about it from Episode III. This is the equivalent of someone going back to Citizen Kane and turning Rosebud into a waffle iron, or giving Hal 9000 a Jamaican accent in 2001: A Space Odyssey.

These actions wouldn't be so bad if Lucas also released the original versions of these movies on Blu-ray, but apparently fans are stuck with the "Special Editions" for now. It’s obvious that most Star Wars geeks will forever be grateful for all of the awe-inspiring moments that George Lucas has brought to the screen over the years, but we just hope he’s done “fixing” these movies at this point. The films, and all of us, have suffered enough.