You'd think that by 2013, buying concert tickets would be so much better and easier and more fair than it was in past years. Like, remember when Ticketmaster was so awful that Pearl Jam tried to sue them and basically stopped touring in protest?

Well, you'd be wrong. As a case study, learn from the Arcade Fire's upcoming Brooklyn and Miami shows in the lead-up to their highly anticipated new album, Reflektor. The shows have the band being billed as The Reflektors, and they're taking place in tiny, intimate venues. Tickets went on sale to the general public today at noon and, like so many people wanting to go to a dream concert before them, Arcade Fire fans readied their computers and browsers, aimed them at Ticketmaster's site, and got ready to go.

At 12:00 p.m., they hit the button.

By 12:01, tickets were sold out. Though really, given the amount of people who didn't get tickets, they were probably more likely to be sold out 59 seconds before then. But you know who did get tickets?


And not just scalpers, but the mean-spirited ones who, at this point, are just toying with the rest of us:

This is yet another reminder of yet another way that going to see live music sucks, and that scalpers are the scum of the earth, the succubi of our dreams, ruiners of our culture. If you know one, please remind them that they're a waste of life today. If you are one, please die. Thanks.

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