Doug Funnie Luxe

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Have you guys ever wondered how to become a luxe Doug Funnie? Well, Junya Watanabe must have been re-upping on some old Nicktoon reruns while he was designing this tee. Yes, this is an argyle paneled T-shirt and, I know, technically Doug Funnie wore a green sweater vest, but don't waste your time giving me shit about it. This is close enough. At least, it would be for my friends. I guarantee I show up to one of our weekly Bravo watching parties with this getup on and it would take exactly 2.3 seconds before I got called Quailman. But, whatever, I totally would smash Patty Mayonnaise. For real, don't you guys have a weird soft spot girls with really gravelly voices? I do. In college there was this sorority girl that had a really gravelly voice. That's it. Nothing happened and we had zero classes together, but I'd always see her at Alpha Delt's beer nights until I got banned from Alpha Delt's beer nights 'cause me and my best friend kept going into rooms we weren't allowed in. And one time we found, like, all these weird trophies and paddles and shit and when we got caught in the frat's trophy room, my buddy just threw down his beer bottle in front of us like it was a Batman smoke bomb. Only it wasn't. It was just a bottle of Rolling Rock that smashed and spread shards of glass everywhere. So, in an act of solidarity, I did the same thing with my Bud and then we ran away. The next time we tried to float into beer night the bros were like, "Nah," so I never did develop a solid rapport with that girl with the gravelly voice.

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