Jared Leto is a god, right? Like, what other guy out there could pull off being both a lead singer of a relatively big-name garbage rock band, then go right ahead and win an Oscar for playing an HIV-positive trans woman? As the saying goes, women want him (re: his hair), men want to be him. To add to his ever-expanding repertoire because it's nothing to stunt, a couple days ago on Twitter, he announced a line of signature fanny packs, standing shirtless in the desert because Jared Leto. That's normal. For just $32, you can have your own Leto-endorsed fanny pack, which is delightfully labeled as a "hip pack" on his webstore, in red or black and adorned with a depiction of what is surely an intern designed cross logo. Ripped abs and long, luscious locks not necessarily included with purchase. How many of these do you think were actually produced? Like, can Leto move units? Now, I'm not saying my penis moved when I saw the above photo and thought about the possibility of wearing the same fanny pack, but I'm not saying it didn't either.