The Best And Worst Dressed (And Most Heavily On Drugs) At The 2014 British Fashion Awards

Image via Complex Original

The Beckhams

They're like the power couple everyone else is jealous of. While the murdered out tux reminds me of a high school prom move gone horribly wrong, Becks makes it work because he's tatted the fuck up and just, like, almost too handsome, ya know?

Rihanna

Rihanna's BFA invitation, like all her invite, clearly must have read: "Dress Code: Thot Black Tie." It's like she's the dark side of The Force or some shit. Anyone else psyched for the new Star Wars movie?

Kendall Jenner

And Kendall would be the light side.

Cara Delevingne

For as counterculture and "cool" as Cara usually is, this look is pretty fucking boring, no? As always, eyebrows on fleek.

Poppy Delevingne

It looks like we have a Pippa-Kate situation on our hands with Poppy and Cara because Poppy looks fucking good, fam. Damn, even their names work. God works in mysterious ways.

Alexa Chung

Straight from Plymouth Rock with the bedazzled puritan dress. Hope everyone had a fabulous Thanksgiving.

Rita Ora and Tom Ford

Rita Ora, one step closer

to becoming Rihanna. Just like we called out. Also, Tom Ford is a vampire, right? Pharrell, if you're reading this, can you help clarify in the comments? Thanks.

Harry Styles

Harry usually looks like certified garbaggio despite being a certified gawd, but this Lanvin suit looks pretty dope. Would attempt this fit in real life and fail miserably.

Naomi Campbell

Naomi Campbell scares me a little bit, so I don't want to say anything about how it looks like her bondage straps came along to the show with her. Crazy eyes don't lie.

Joan Smalls

This reminds me of kindergarten when you fold over pieces of construction paper to cut out snowflakes. Only this time, you have a boner.

Emma Watson

Emma has become one of the best red carpet celebrities of our time and this menswear-inspired get-up only reinforces that fact. Expecto Baetronum!

Karlie Kloss

Karlie is the girl in college who bought three yards of fabric for the toga party and looks better than everyone there without even trying. All her bff's probably talk shit about her having an eating disorder behind her back.

Courtney Love, Renzo Rosso of Diesel and Lana Del Rey

Ayy, we found the most heavily on drugs. Well, that was easy.

Anna Wintour and a fan

Anna's dress is a new Margiela design by John Galliano, which sends a message. She still looks like she could end my career in three words. So, mission accomplished, I guess.

Side note: Anyone else having trouble deleting Bee Shaffer's ice bucket challenge off their DVR? No? Just me? Word.

Mario Testino and Eva Herzigova

One of the most successful photographers in the world, with a model on his arm, and the dude still can't find a pair of non-square-toed loafers for an awards show. SMFH. This is why we can't have nice things.

Alice Temperley

Whoever Alice Temperley is, she killed this shit. Fuck your red carpet. This is luxe.

Ellie Goulding

I almost didn't recognize Ellie Goulding without a bunch of glitter all over her fucking face. This is a better look methinks.

Anna Kendrick

Don't you fucking dare say anything negative about Anna Kendrick or every acapella fan in the world will be at your throat because she brought their "sport" to the forefront. Also, I will be mad because we are in love. Now, if she would only return those letters I worked so hard on writing in blood.

David Gandy

This could easily be a wax sculpture of a perfect looking man for all I know. I'm not sure TBH. He's also doing that thing McConnaughey does in those Lincoln commercials with his hands, which makes me giggle. Though nothing about David Gandy shitting all over your entire existence is funny.

Lily Allen

I didn't know Lily Allen was still kicking, but thanks to all the weird colors and pleats going on here, I just had a epileptic seizure to remind me. I'm pretty sure that's what she was going for.

Lewis Hamilton and Nicole Scherzinger

Formula One world champion and a former Pussycat Doll. In all seriousness, probably the best dressed people there. Look at how their greys and reds match without being too matchy-matchy. This has been your one slide of actual fashion critique. WOW. I wasn't sure I was capable of that either, fam.

Twiggy

Apparently, Jack Sparrow is a lesbian magician and going by Twiggy now.