Detritus In Your Pocket

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The Woodlands decided that all the pocket tees in the universe fucking suck, so they made their own. Heavyweight jersey, a good fit, solid construction, YOU FUCKS KNOW THE DEAL BY NOW. I love pocket tees because my grandpa always wore pocket tees and kept fourteen million tissues in the pocket. I keep, like, one tissue and then a lighter and probably a dollar's worth that I got in change. But that only lasts until I see a reflection of myself and realize that it looks like I have a really weird left nipple because of all the detritus in my chest pocket. I don't know how gramps managed that look, but it was probably by giving zero fucks.

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