If there ever was a jam that was most assuredly my jam, then coke white tassel loafers would be my fucking jam. You can oversee your empire of ill-gotten gains or just trudge to work on a Tuesday like the don dada you probably aren't. They are truly that versatile. And don’t worry about getting them dirty either. The dirtier your fancy white dress shoes, the cooler you are. In fact, they more accurately show the zero fucks you give than the fanciful claims that reside within your Twitter bio. I have a pair of white tassel loafers, but, unfortunately for me, whenever I wear them people never really say anything because I hang out with philistines who don't notice important shit like white tassel loafers.