P-P-P-Patchwork locked down! These EG shorts are perfect because you can wear a boring ass white T-shirt with them and still look all relevant and shit because you'll appear to be experimenting with pattern matching, even if you and I know you're just being lazy. Pattern matching is one of those lame menswear techniques that sounds really important and next level, but, when you think about it, is really just a basic move you used to do all the time as a kid. Though, back then, it was called being a stupid little shit.

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