Technically this is a "booney" hat, so I don’t want to hear shit from the anti-bucket establishment. If you were really real, and I mean, like, really real, you’d clip your SkyTel to the straps on the hat. That would make an otherwise lightweight and comfortable accessory heavy and awkward, but, on the other hand, you’d have a SkyTel on your bucket, which is pretty incredible. I’m pretty sure this will be the last bucket hat and pager reference for a while because I want to keep my job and sometimes editors have to maintain things like VARIETY and RELEVANCE, no matter how ridiculous that may sound. But it’s not their fault. It’s the readers who demand new and more constantly. SO, IT’S YOUR FUCKING FAULT.