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You've surely heard a lot of folks lately talking about how they're going to "Make America Great Again," but these idiots are late. America was already made great again about a decade ago by LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony, Kobe Bryant, and a snake in human skin who goes by the name of Jerry Colangelo. Colangelo, the director of USA Basketball, took a downtrodden American basketball program fresh off a colossally disappointing bronze medal finish in the 2004 Summer Olympics and injected a much-needed dose of enthusiasm and patriotism. With the help of aforementioned superstars like Bron, Melo, and Kobe, and a new men's head coach in Mike Krzyzewski​, Colangelo's new USA Basketball "Redeem Team" brought the gold back to the world's only basketball superpower by going undefeated in the 2008 Summer Olympics. The program followed up that effort by going undefeated all the way through the 2010 FIBA World Championships, the 2012 Summer Olympics, and the 2014 FIBA World Championships. America was great again.

Today the official roster for the 2016 Men's Olympic team was released and, although the talent remains impressive and the team is your likely gold medal winner, it was a bit disappointing. The two best players on earth—both Americans and players we watched go head-to-head for seven games in the NBA Finals—will not be in Rio. Neither will the back-to-back defensive player of the year Kawhi Leonard. Or James Harden. Or Russell Westbrook.

Team USA basketball, it seems, has a stronger squad sitting on their couches this summer than playing in Brazil. So we wanted to find out for sure. is a website that offers the ability to simulate professional sports in remarkable detail, so we uploaded the official Team USA Basketball roster as well as our best NOT Team USA Basketball roster to see which squad is supreme. allowed us to set our starters, the coaching rotations, and even the location of the game (a neutral Washington D.C. court because America), and below are the details of how the game turned out, complete with play-by-play. Sure, it's NBA rules instead of FIBA rules, but the result is the result.

This is Team USA Basketball Vs. Team Declined USA Basketball: A Detailed Simulation.