Working out sucks. Yeah, it's good for you, and yeah, it'll help you live longer, and yeah, you'll feel great if you do it, and blah, blah, blahhhhhhh. But c'mon, nobody actually wants to work out, right? Wrong.

A new "non-certified personal trainer" named Chuck M. wants to work out. And he wants you to work out with him. A Reddit user just spotted an ad for him inside of a gym and, we have to admit, his résumé is interesting. He's a "self-trained" Judo Master, has seen every Bruce Lee movie, "is really strong," and pretty much promises that, if you work out with him, you'll be able to outrun the police and (possibly, if you work really hard) punch ghosts.

That 1996 Presidential Fitness Award is pretty awesome, too, eh?

Still not convinced? Wait, there's more! In addition to the flyer posted above, Chuck M. has also put together a video résumé to show you what he's all about. And if you weren't blown away by him before, we promise you this will do the trick:

Wondering where to sign up? See here. You're very welcome.

Send all complaints, compliments, and tips to

[via Obvious Plant]