A Compilation of Athletes Crashing and Burning Into Your DMs

Trying to slide into those DMs? Let these athlete DM disasters show you what not to do.

Aug 14, 2014
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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

Since the invention of Twitter, there have been no shortage of high-profile athletes embarrassing themselves on the 140-character social site. Can you blame them? With so many fans, sponsors, media members, and sexually adventurous side pieces out there all trying to pull them in different directions, it's a wonder how they don't get caught Twitter-slipping more often.

Direct Messaging makes their relative good behavior all the more impressive. With thousands of groupies only a quick DM away, you'd think there'd be a new screencap of lurid exchanges popping up on your timeline every few hours. Obviously that's not the case. Unbelievably, most athletes are well-behaved (or secretive) enough to keep themselves out of the internet headlines. 

But not all of them.

Sometimes a sports figure can't help but get caught slipping on Twitter. Sometimes a fan's troll game is too strong. Sometimes a team's front office is being too one-sided. Sometimes a player's just too anxious to find out if a fan is trying to get the pipe. These are the cases that make up our Compilation of Athletes Crashing and Burning into Your DMs.

12. Marco Belinelli

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DATE: 11/3/2013

Oh, Marco. It's going to take more than a few clunky sexual DMs to make something happen with a high-class princess who goes by the name of "@G0ldbluntz". A woman with a name like that is obviously accustomed to the finer things in life.  Three-point champ or not, you're not going to score with G0ldbluntz tossing bricks like that.

11. Amar'e Stoudemire

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DATE: 6/23/2012

Amar'e apologized 10 hours later, but sometimes it's better to not DM hatespeech to a stranger when you're a high-profile NBA player. Responding with "Sorry bro!!" won't always cut it.

10. Troy Aikman

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DATE: 6/6/2013

Hey Troy, we're not mad at you for trying to get at Mari Morrow (not "Marrow"), but that's not how it works. That's not how any of this works. If you're looking to call up one of the chicks in your bullpen, you gotta make sure you send actual DMs and aren't broadcasting your intentions to the whole of the internet.

9. Marcus Jordan

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DATE: 5/30/2012

Obviously Marcus Jordan denied this was his tweet by saying, "Lol everybody that knows me knos I would never send an 'Accidental' tweet like that.. Whoever it was, nice prank tho." And how could we not believe him? The Jordan name is one of honor and no Jordan would dare ever get into any questionable behavior off the court.

8. Tyrann Mathieu

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DATE: 5/17/2013

The Honey Badger has gone through a lot in his career with failed drug tests and injuries and questions about his ability to adapt to the NFL, yet through solid play has become one of the better young safeties in the league when healthy. But no number of interceptions, pass deflections, or big hits are going to make people think it's okay to ask a 17 year-old girl, "When you make 18."  MAKE? C'mon, bruh.

7. Darnell Dockett

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DATE: 1/7/2013

This was almost certainly a joke by one of the NFL's better Twitter personalities, but are there any among us who doubt that Darnell Dockett would've seriously taken A.J. McCarron's now-fiancé Katherine Webb to Wing Stop and KOD? 

6. Dwight Howard

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DATE: 7/16/2012

Sometimes as a player you may feel the need to air out your organization. Completely understandable. What's not understandable is doing it through Twitter DMs to someone who you obviously can't trust. That's the Dwight Howard difference.

5. Jose Canseco

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DATE: 2/23/2012

Did Jose backpedal here because his girl found out or because the woman he was DMing showed a less-than-appealing picture? One of the great (former) athlete Direct Message mysteries. Either way, definitely not a good look for this lady's self-esteem.

4. Joffrey Lupul

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DATE: 6/25/2012

NBA, NFL, and MLB guys don't have all the fun, hockey bros still get groupies. Of course not all of them are as slick as their professional athlete counterparts, as showcased here by Maple Leafs right winger Joffrey Lupul. Giving out your main email for a few nudes, breh? Would've been better off opening a new email account called "SendJoffreyLupulNudes@hotmail.com" and calling it a day.

3. Ray Allen

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DATE: 2/23/2009

Very few things will make your skin crawl more than this particular DM failure. It's not that Ray Allen is a bad looking guy or that we can't think of him doing anything sexual (see: Big State recruiting scene from He Got Game), but Ray Allen dirty talk just makes us feel...weird. You were just golfing with the President, Jesus! 

2. J.R. Smith

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DATE: 1/26/2013

The man, the myth, the legend himself. The DM that launched a thousand several thousand tweets. What else would we expect from a dude whose senior yearbook quote was "Get chicks or die tryin'"? The six words J.R. Smith used in this message put the rest of the NBA on notice. Nobody slides in DMs like J.R. Nobody.

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