Baby Mama: Kim Zolciak

When you marry a bag from Bravo's Real Housewives series, by definition, you're going to find yourself in some drama. These days, Kroy Biermann plays more defense in the gossip rags than he does for the Atlanta Falcons. The defensive end now has to swat down weekly cheating allegations like Drew Brees passes to the flat, while his wife tries to cave in NeNe Leaks' forehead with a Jimmy Choo heel on TV. We totally expect their kids to be well adjusted.