Hey, Philadelphia Eagles fans, things aren't this bad right now, are they?!

The Eagles actually have a pretty decent chance to make the playoffs this season, due in large part to the fact that the entire NFC East stinks this year. But one Eagles fan is apparently still so fed up with his team and their lackluster performances over the years that he's ready to give up on them altogether. And he's selling his allegiance to the Eagles on eBay right now to prove it.

"I am selling my soul, my love, my conviction, my desire, my loyalty, and my allegiance to the highest bidder," the seller writes. "Whomever wins, I will completely and wholeheartedly root, cheer, praise, and worship their football team until the end of my days. This is a risk, but life is short and I want to belong to a team that will win; I must experience it, I must taste it, I must BE it."

The seller then writes that he will use the proceeds from the auction to pay for his wedding next September and says that he will wear gear supporting his new favorite team on the altar. And just in case any Eagles fans out there try and stop him, he provides a warning.

"Should any Eagles fans try to save my mortality, I warn you that it will cost you dearly," he writes. "I have loved this team and been burned for far, far too long. I have no choice but to offer up all I have left."

Wow. Everything about this is both incredibly sad and incredibly awesome. So who wants this guy's allegiance? At the moment, you can have it for less than 20 bucks. Happy bidding.

RELATED: Gallery: The Most Repulsive NFL Fans

[via Sports Illustrated]