Career years: 1984-2003

Don't get into a basketball debate when a Michael Jordan stan is lurking on your timeline. Or really any debate for that matter. You could be discussing whether garlic fries or curly fries are better, and an MJ stan will climb out of the Twitter abyss and declare that because MJ likes steak fries, that's the best fry. We all love to pay homage to MJ on a basketball and cultural level, but reminding the world that he's basketball's G.O.A.T. at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night isn't necessary. Fall back, Jordans stans. Or better yet, retire. MJ did.