16. Cristiano Ronaldo

Lifespan: 2001-2009
Reminds us of: Goku with a tan.

Cristiano, you've been through a lot. There was the early-stage faux-hawk-with-mullet combo. Then, the gel, gel, gel period. And do not forget the spiky blonde accents phase. You seem to have settled down a bit with age, but the next bad idea is just a cover shoot away. We still give him props for having the ultimate track record. #cantknockthehustle