The speed limit is technically the legal maximum speed at which one can travel on a given road. In reality, it's more like a baseline speed that is meant to be added to. Everybody under the age of 90 drives five to 10 miles an hour over the limit. Almost everybody will get pulled over for doing so at some point. Getting a speeding ticket sucks by virtue of both the sudden disappearance of beer money and the point on your license. If you live in a state like Texas, at least there are no license points given for speeding, which makes tickets seem more like a “fast tax,” which is somehow more palatable.

But we digress. When those lights start flashing in your rearview mirror, everybody panics a little and starts thinking of a way to not end up getting a ticket out of the experience. Here are some ideas, some less hair-brained than others, for how to make that cop decide that a warning is in order today.