99. Ronaldo Gets Caught with Trannies

Date: 4/28/2008
Key Players: Brazilian soccer star Ronaldo and three transvestite prostitutes
Video Evidence: Click Here.

Ronaldo got more than he bargained for when he took three prostitutes back to a hotel room in Rio de Janeiro-and by "more", we mean penises. When Ronaldo discovered his, uh, pre-dick-ament, he offered money for the hoes to bounce, but one of them threatened to go to the media if he didn't cough up more. Ronaldo then went to the police, and the scandal was born. Our question: Was Ronaldo really surprised he had solicited a trio of trannies? We don't know for sure, but we think he might've been on that Eddie Murphy.

YOU AUGHTA KNOW:
Around the time of the scandal, a Brazilian porn company announced a new movie starring a Ronaldo lookalike and one of the soccer star's actual ex-girlfriends, Vivi Brunieri.