UFC 133 Preview: Somebody's Career Will End Tomorrow

Two former champs enter the octagon Saturday night. Only one's walking out with a chance to step back in.

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UFC 133 is a win or get cut event. UFC bossman, Dana White, doesn't suffer mediocre fighters lightly and this is one of those cards that pits up-and-comers vs seasoned veterans. Will the kids break through to the elite level or will the vets defend the top of the mountain?

With the exception of the main event, Rashad Evans (20-1-1) vs Tito Ortiz (17-8-1), UFC 133 isn't a star-packed affair. However, all the match-ups are intriguing because they're even on paper. Paper doesn't fight people. People fight people. But a card of fair ones can be better than a card of famous ones. Even matches are always more exciting: less decisions. More people getting knocked the f**k out and laid to bed like toddlers. Night-night, son. Send us a postcard from your new job at Arby's. 

If you can't make it here, you can't make it anywhere.
 

Intro

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5. Rory "The Water Boy" MacDonald vs Mike "Quicksand" Pyle

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4. Jorge "El Conquistador" Rivera vs Constantinos "Costa" Phillippou

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Dennis "Superman" Hallman vs Brian "Bad Boy" Ebersole : ebersole by decision

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Vitor "The Phenom" Belfort vs Yoshihiro "Sexyama" Akiyama

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Vitor "The Phenom" Belfort vs Yoshihiro "Sexyama" Akiyama

Better Talk Game: Gotta go with Akiyama. He calls himself Sexyama and appears to fancy himself a ladies man. Look out Rick Yune, there's a new snazzy asian bad guy in town. Sexyama doesn't speak a lot of English but his press conferences are always hilarious. Vitor, on the other hand, just wants you to know about Jesus. I feel you homes, times were tough, but we'll pass on the spiritual advice 'til we catch up with the Dalai Lama.

Inside Scoop, Belfort: Ripley's believe it not, Vitor was the champion of this fight game before there were weight classes. No one wanted to fight him because he was knocking fools out in 20 seconds flat. Then he disappeared to deal with personal issues. Thanks to the Notorious G.O.D., he's back. That's right, he found Jesus. But turnabout is fair play and in his last fight, against Anderson Silva, he took a front kick to the fa-che three minutes into the fight and when he woke up he was in his dressing room. It was a real "Kobe, tell me how my ass taste" kinda moment. This is it for Belfort. If he can't win here he's headed back to Brazil and going into the coconut water business.

Inside Scoop, Akiyama: This dude came over from Japan with a lot of fanfare. It didn't last long. He picked up two victories then got submitted by Chris Leben and lost a unanimous decision to Michael Bisping. That puts him squarely in the "file under mediocre" pile. His press conference talk game is entertaining but he hasn't shown much in the octagon. If he can't beat Belfort, who appears to be past his prime, he doesn't belong in the UFC.

Prediction: Belfort has looked timid since his return. Too much church or something. What happened to the dude who at age 19, was finishing cats with strikes in sub-60-second matches? You're not gonna see that guy but we do expect Vitor to find Akiyama's chin and finish him before the end of the second round... if not sooner.

 

"Suga" Rashad Evans vs "The Huntington Beach Bad Boy" Tito Ortiz

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