Poor, poor big-time college basketball coaches. They get paid a couple million dollars a year to yell at teenagers, and for all their hard work, what do they get? A bunch of geeky, annoying questions from a bunch of geeky, annoying sportswriters. For the love of James Naismith and his peach basket, why can't the media just go away (because of course the basketball games that these coaches make their money off of would be spontaneously disseminated through dust motes or something if the press wasn't there to cover them).

That's a lot of geeky, annoying things for grown-ass men to have to put up with, and not surprisingly, occasionally these coaches flip the eff out. Just in the past week, North Carolina's Roy Williams and UConn's Jim Calhoun both went a little 7:30 on reporters. But neither of their recent rants made our list of The Greatest Press Conference Meltdowns in NCAA Basketball History...

#5. JIM CALHOUN 2004

• First rule in public relations: If someone asks why you enjoy masturbating to "My Little Pony" cartoons, don't reply "How did you know?" Queried about why he didn't recruit Providence's Ryan Gomes, Calhoun proceeds to give the excuse that he did recruit Emeka Okafor and Caron Butler (not a bad excuse actually) as well as admit that he fucked up (five times). Thick skin not required for coaching big-time college athletics apparently.
Click NEXT to See Jim Boeheim's Meltdown


#4. JIM BOEHEIM 2006

• In this presser after the '06 Big East Tournament, Syracuse's longtime head coach employs the be-chill-and-then-drop-the-F-bomb meltdown strategy. Works on us every time.
Click NEXT to see Bob Knight's Classic Press Conference

#3. BOB KNIGHT 1993

• Bob Knight's crazier than a bag full of drunk ferrets, but this clip from the '93 NCAA tourney shows his softer side. They always did say the General had the best acid in the Midwest.
Click NEXT to see Kevin Borseth's Breakdown


• Who says the women's game isn't as fun as the men's? University of Michigan head women's coach Kevin Borseth went a peculiar sort of batshit in this clip from last year. We're assuming his menstrual cycle is perfectly in sync with his team's.
Click NEXT to see #1, John Chaney's Threat to John Calipari!

#1. JOHN CHANEY 1994

• Making death threats at your own press conference is one thing. Making a death threat at somebody else's presser, now that's just gangster. Eff it, we never liked John Calipari either.