'Curb Your Enthusiasm's' Most Uncomfortable Moments, Ranked

Before the premier of the HBO series’ 9th season, here’s a ranking of Larry David’s most awkward moments.

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larry david

larry david

The discomfort began in 1974. At the time Larry David had just left the National Guard. He was like most left-leaning 27 year-olds grappling with the Vietnam War: wayward, enraged, vaguely unemployed. Then, one night, in a Greenwich Village comedy club, David stepped up to mic.

With his unkempt curls and horn-rimmed glasses, David began. From the jump he had something to say—and said it loudly. What the young comedian lacked in craft, he made up for in attitude. David’s goal then—as it is now—was to make the audience squirm. He flourishes in the unrest of others.

In time David’s talents proved to be best used elsewhere. While co-creating Seinfeld will always be atop his CV, Curb Your Enthusiasm has done something else for the Brooklyn-born comic. It’s opened audiences up to him, his distinct comedic sensibility: Jewish, nebbish, and, most of all, petty.

In eight seasons of glorious television, David has mastered the art of anxiety through his beloved HBO series. To celebrate the return of Curb Your Enthusiasm this weekend, we’ve decided to embrace David, and rank the most uncomfortable situations during the show’s run.

10. Season 4, Episode 2: “Ben’s Birthday”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry arrives giftless to a birthday party, stabs birthday boy in the eye

Larry should never really go to parties. He doesn’t want to go parties. Nobody especially needs him to attend a party. In fact, everyone involved would probably just be happier if Larry just sat at home and kvetched alone. And yet Los Angeles forces him to leave his house, again and again. This time Larry finds himself at Ben Stiller’s birthday, where he has arrived without a gift. “You said no gifts!” he protests. Stiller then explains basic birthday etiquette. Later in the party, after refusing to sing the Happy Birthday song, Larry accidentally punctures Stiller in the eye with a skewer. He’s promptly asked to leave the party—his wish came true.

9. Season 3, Episode 6: “The Special Section”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: “Sorry I can’t make it, my mother just died.”

The only thing Larry dislikes more than parties are obligations. Upon learning of his mother’s death, he discovers a universal sympathy from the world around him. People, believe it or not, feel bad for Larry. Naturally, he begins to exploit their kindness. He gets out of obligatory luncheons, dinners with friends he doesn’t really care about, and pretty much anything he doesn’t want to do by mentioning this tragic death in the family. The only thing Larry can’t seem to finesse is his mother’s gravesite, which has been placed in the “special section” of the cemetery due to a tattoo on her buttock. Without revealing too much, you can bet Larry didn’t, uh, rest until changes were made.

8. Season 7, Episode 3: “The Reunion”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry obsesses over tip coordination.

Season 7 may be peak Curb Your Enthusiasm. It sees Larry trying to recreate the past by designing a Seinfeld reunion show. The proceedings are rocky from the beginning. To celebrate the start of a new show, the head of NBC offers Larry tickets to a Lakers game. When Larry arrives, he’s appalled that his gifted seats are in the rafters. Larry subsequently chews out the head of NBC. The more unbearable interactions come earlier, though, when Larry goes back to a restaurant where he and Jason Alexander dined. Upon exit, Alexander refused to tell Larry how much he left for a tip. Apoplectic, Larry accosts the waiter for the information. “A tip is not a concert, it’s a solo, Larry,” says Jerry. This whole episode—and season—is Larry sticking to his principles. He wants transparency in tips.

7. Season 2, Episode 3: “Trick or Treat”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: A Halloween refusal. Larry is unconvinced by incoming trick or treaters.

Larry and Cheryl’s home is teepeed on Halloween after Larry refuses to give two girls candy. His defense is that the girls were a little old for the festivities and, most importantly, were not dressed up. No costume, no candy. The highlight of this episode comes the morning after, when two police officers arrive at the house. Larry proceeds to tell them why he refused them sweets. “Bald Asshole” is spray-painted on the front door. “That’s a hate crime!” Larry insists. “We’re a sect, we’re a group.” Baldness as a group. The final part of the joke is Larry believing that the “Trick” portion of “trick or treat” is a threat. “No treat, trick.” Two serious officers stare at Larry, dumbfounded by his principles. “I will not be intimidated,” says Larry. “Not even on Halloween.”

6. Season 8, Episode 1: “The Divorce”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry coaches a preteen’s first step into womanhood.

The log-line for Curb Your Enthusiasm could just read: “Larry David unwittingly finds himself in unusual situations, seven days a week.” Here Larry is present for a young girl’s first period. (Side note: she was in the house selling girl scout cookies for a school fundraiser.) Without panicking too much, Larry fetches a tampon. “I got an ex-wife. She’s a woman. She left stuff upstairs that’s going to be very valuable to you,” he says. Okay, maybe there’s a little panic. Confused by the tampon directions, Larry coaches the preteen through it. “The plastic applicator,” he begins. This is the type of interaction no one is ready to have. Should he refrain from guiding her during this uncomfortable moment? Should he lend aid? Maybe he should just call her parents first? Larry, as always, does his best, which isn’t saying much.  

5. Season 6, Episode 5: “The Freak Book”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry brings a noxious birthday gift for Ted Danson.

Forced once again out of isolation and into a social gathering, Larry arrives at Ted Danson’s birthday party with a peculiar gift. It’s a coffee table book called “Mondo Freaks,” a photographic collection of carnal oddities and malformed bodies. Larry finds it fascinating, Danson is appalled. While Larry and Jeff Garlin are laughing at the book, their limo driver from the evening enters. Larry thought it’s only fair that he come inside—instead of waiting in the car—and join the festivities. The driver gets plastered and quickly stumbles into furniture. He then gropes Danson’s wife. All of this nonsense leads to Larry’s ejection. “Take your creepy friend and your freak book and get out of here,” yells Danson.

4. Season 5, Episode 3: “The Christ Nail”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry makes a peculiar purchase for his maid and ruins the tooth fairy for a child.

George Costanza believed in his lies, Larry David believes in his truths. Larry’s maid has not worn a bra in 15 years. Why he knows this information is not the point. He wants to help. To do so he goes to a woman’s undergarment store to make a purchase. He believes this is a good deed. Unfortunately, this puts Larry in a precarious position with the maid’s husband and neighbors. Later in the episode Larry is stomping around the Garlin household with his new shoes. They’re squeaky and not broken in. Walking through the hallway, he wakes up little Sammy, who in turn catches her mother putting money under her pillow. The myth of the tooth fairy has become undone. “It had to happen eventually,” Larry insists. Susie delivers a classic beatdown: “You’re a stupid fucking idiot. We decide when she knows about the tooth fairy, you misanthropic moron.”

3. Season 8, Episode 10: “Larry vs. Michael J. Fox”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry doesn’t believe everything can be chalked up to Parkinson’s. Yes, this is real.  

Before a six-year hiatus, Larry pitted himself against Michael J. Fox in the season 8 finale. There wasn’t supposed to be a battle, but of course Fox’s apartment is directly above Larry’s. Because of Parkinson’s, Fox’s feet often cramp up and force him to “clomp” around his apartment to keep the blood flowing. This starts an episode-long investigation into whether all of Fox’s behavior can be chalked up to Parkinson’s. Only Larry David would question another man’s very serious disease. It’s a testament to Fox for being so good-humored about his condition. Should the episode have been released in 2017, it’s interesting to wonder what kind of “think pieces” would be written to castrate Larry and his ableism.

2. Season 2, Episode 4: “The Shrimp Incident”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry accosts an HBO executive for maybe stealing his shrimp.

Tough to choose just one moment from a season in which Larry trips (and injures) Shaquille O’Neal or offers a drive by comment on Wanda Sykes’ behind, but here we are. In episode four, Larry insists that an HBO executive (Allan Wasserman) has taken shrimp out of his Chinese food following a take-out mix-up. Larry later has to meet with this executive to pitch a show. A meeting that very quickly turns to Larry unpacking the shrimp slight. These types of arguments are where Curb thrives. They’re mundane and absurd and mostly pointless—but Larry has attached significance to them. He sees Wasserman’s reckless abandon—pillaging his Chinese food—as character defining.

1. Season 8, Episode 3: “The Palestinian Chicken”

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Why It’s Super Uncomfortable: Larry relentlessly points out the flaws of his friends; he’s forced to choose between good (Palestinian) chicken or Judaism.  

The best episode of Curb, of course, also contains some of its most uncomfortable moments. Larry gleefully accepts the title of “social assassin,” as his friends ask him to say what they can’t. One husband wants his wife to stop howling “lol” in lieu of actual laughter. A woman dieting presses Larry to keep her honest, even when she desires a chocolate pastry. Then there’s Susie, who makes a loud “aaaah” noise after sipping her cappuccino. Larry confronts each of these interactions with a sort of psychotic fearlessness. The episode’s most comically unbearable situation comes during its finale. After a golf game goes awry, and Larry must make a choice between siding with his Jewish kinfolk or eating quality (albeit Palestinian) chicken. Like always, Larry’s stuck in the middle, all by himself.

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