One of the most contentious issues this election boils down to a single chair. Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton have sparred repeatedly over who will inherit the open seat in the Supreme Court, which was vacated when conservative Justice Antonin Scalia passed away in February. President Obama already nominated his choice, but congress refuses to consider it, while Trump promised that if he’s elected, Scalia’s replacement will be pro-life, and a rabid defender of our right to bear arms. In other words, it’s one giant clusterf*ck.
The good news is, this is the first time in our history that the Supreme Court has become a central issue in a presidential election. And, if Stephen Colbert has his way, it won’t ever happen again. All we have to do is unlock the secret to eternal life. NBD. “To stabilize the court, clearly we need to appoint only Supreme Court justices who live forever,” The Late Show host said during his Friday night monologue. Colbert even provided some suggestions: “Justice Galapagos turtle, Justice Redwood, and Justice Ruth Bader Ginsborg.” We're all in.
Colbert’s bright idea wasn’t the only thing he offered the American people Friday. Later in the show, The Price is Right Host Drew Carey dropped by to answer the one question that might be even more important to Americans than the one of who will win the election come November. That’s right folks, we finally know the secret of how to win at Plinko. Our long national nightmare is officially over. Watch below.