Holy shit. You have to see this video of some guy named Daniel Lawrence Whitney arm-wrestling an army veteran by the name of John. Whitney, more commonly known among the redneck community as Larry the Cable Guy, was caught on video by TMZ accepting John's arm-wrestling challenge before unceremoniously BREAKING THE DUDE'S ARM.
This bizarre display of arm strength went down at the University of Nebraska football game Saturday, at which point John reportedly approached the alleged cable guy (and confirmed Huskers fan) about wrestling each other's arms. The battle appears to be relatively close until John's humerus bone is heard fucking snapping, thus awarding victory to Larry the Cable Guy by default. Right? I'm not up on the rules of arm wrestling.
Though Larry the Cable Guy has since revealed this moment has inspired him to walk away from arm wrestling forever, John has made no such claims of retirement. He did, however, have to endure a bout of surgery. According to TMZ, dude had a plate put in his arm and is expected to be totally fine. The humerus bone, as bone enthusiasts will note, is also known as the funny bone.
But back to this business of being a "cable guy." There's only one confirmed cable guy in this industry, and that's Jim Carrey.
*applauds self for not once mentioning Larry's "Git-R-Done" catchphrase*