Fox's IRL Tinder Show Is Bringing Back So-Bad-It's-Good Reality TV

'Coupled' continues Fox's legacy in garbage reality dating programming.

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It’s super easy to complain about how awful dating is in 2016 (hell, I just did it last week) because of a myriad of factors: people taking their time to get married, the rise of dating apps, the eschewing of traditional gender roles. But the universally messy truths of dating just make it that much easier to relate to the others crashing and burning alongside us. It’s why we talk at length about awful dates and failed relationships, why The Bachelor has been on for 20 seasons, and why we talk mad shit about Tinder (or whatever app of the moment) but keep swiping. 

It was inevitable that the dating app era would inspire a reality dating show, and the crazed minds at Fox are the first to tap the well with Coupled, premiering tonight. According to its press release, Coupled features a group of “12 single, smart and young professional women looking for love" on a Caribbean island. Yeah, sounds like pretty much every dating show. But Coupled is actually IRL Tinder, where the men are helicoptered in and the women choose between going back to a bungalow (swiping left) or a tiki bar (swiping right) after a quick initial “chemistry” meeting. For some reason though, the man has the final say, and gets to choose two women to spend time with before picking one to “couple” with. 

Coupled is not good. Despite the premise and use of texting to alert contestants to the various happenings of other contestants, it’s not really all that different from any other reality dating show. Everyone’s blandly hot (although this bunch does appear from first episode to be much more diverse than other shows out there), the sweeping island location is typical and future episodes promise virgins, catfights and bad one-liners. 

So why is Coupled worth watching? Because it’s corny, cheesy, and rough enough around the edges, and it immediately harkens back to Fox’s reality dating show glory days. 

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While they’ve never really committed to a stretch of reality dating programming quite like ABC, Fox has had its fair share of garbage gems, which usually never lasted beyond a season at most. Unlike The Bachelor/The Bachelorette, which has a pretty tried and true formula, and rarely deviates from its sanitary, white-washed fantasy suite leads to engagement which leads to an US Weekly cover breakup 6-12 months later. 

While The Bachelor universe always stresses finding love as a priority, Fox reality dating shows go in with that guise, but gleefully destroy it almost immediately, usually prioritizing mess and drama over the possibility of televised “true love.” That’s apparent with their most well-known hit, Joe Millionaire, which premiered in 2003, with Evan Marriott, a millionaire, who is looking for a bride ala The Bachelor. But the clincher was that Marriott wasn’t actually rich, he was just a guy with a full head of hair who worked in construction. The reveal wouldn’t happen until there was just one woman left and if she took Marriott for who he “really was” the pair would get a check for a million dollars. If not, she’d likely be deemed shallow for not accepting Marriott for who he really was. While the winner Zora Andrich chose Marriott (and gained $1 million dollars), their relationship didn’t work out. Much to the surprise of no one. 

No matter the subject, you can rely on Fox’s dating shows for extremely soapy watching, like Temptation Island (the OG), where several couples lived on an island with a group of sexy singles to “test” their commitments to their relationships. The first Fox reality disaster I fell in love with, Temptation Island had my friends and I spending our high school evenings on three-way calls, recapping the bad behavior of our favorite couples. Around this time, Fox also aired Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire, essentially a beauty pageant that ended with Darva Conger marrying on the spot alleged multi-millionaire Rick Rockwell (not his government name) who more than had a nefarious past that a simple background check would have unearthed. 

Even though they’ve long been the definition of “guilty pleasure” television, a phrase I personally despise, there’s something fascinating about the trajectory of Fox’s reality dating programming. Mostly because it ends up being a hot garbage fire. I can imagine a Fox executive brainstorming ideas: “Now, how can we take the basic idea of The Bachelor, dial it up to 100 and offend as many people as we can?” That’s how you end up with the Littlest Groom, canceled after two episodes, which followed Glen Foster, a little person, on his search for love. Critics pointed a finger at Fox for exploiting Foster as a “freak show.” Similar disgusted reactions came from I Want to Marry Harry, where women competed to marry Prince Harry, who really wasn’t actually Prince Harry at all, because duh. “Prince Harry,” was in fact, an environmental consultant with a vague resemblance to the hot ginger prince. It was later uncovered that Marry Harry contestants were told they were going to be on a show called Dream Date, and critics in turn called Fox’s deception a cruel joke to the women involved. The show was canceled after four episodes. 

Unlike The Bachelor, Fox’s reality dating programming has long not felt the need to prove itself to be wholesome or appropriate, or that it has aims other than exploiting people looking for love (or reality fame) to cause conversation, even if it is deeply negative. They are Chris Harrison’s messy, drama-loving cousin who just wants to cause commotion. 

At least initially, Coupled doesn’t appear to be as big of trash as some of Fox’s previous garbage gems, perhaps an attempt to compete with The Bachelor’s cleanliness, but knowing their track record there’s no way it won’t rapidly unravel. Alex, who deems Vince Vaughn her dream man and Alex who is in a reggae band, while my instant favs, won’t likely be remembered with the Evan Marriotts or the Darla Congers (for as much as they are remembered either). It’ll maybe get canceled after 5 episodes, all of which I’ll be tuning in for, until Vanderpump Rules comes back on.

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