A 59-year-old man was left feeling very vulnerable when he was roughed up by a trio of goons while sun-baking nude at Casuarina Free Beach on Australia Day, NT News reports.
The man was robbed of his backpack, which contained his wallet, keys and phone. Perhaps the most upsetting thing however, was that the contents also included all of his beer – a distinctly despicable act on the most 'Strayan day of the year.
A police spokesman said that the man was enjoying a beer on the beach after midday, when a group asking for a cigarette approached him. One man was identified as wearing an Australian flag bandana around his head, which we all know is usually the sign of a great bloke.
The group returned to demand alcohol and cigarettes only 20 minutes later, before threatening the nudist with beer bottles and pushing him over. The man suffered grazes and scratches in the altercation, and after giving chase was pushed to the ground. At this stage police are still looking for the trio, so if you're planning on a sneaky skinny dip sometime soon, you'll probably at least need to give it a quick second thought.