What is life but a series of random events with no inherent meaning other than the ones we assign them through a process of false worth and the sculpting of a fabricated identity? Which is to say, hey, did you know Nick Jonas and Kendall Jenner are (reportedly) dating? The couple is supposedly the latest creation from the matchmaking genius of one Gigi Hadid and Nick's fellow ex-Disney punk rock star Joe Jonas.
The two were initially introduced due to Gigi's desire to "have Kendall around all the time," according to esteemed existential literature critics Us Weekly. "Nick was single and looking to date and there was an obvious attraction," claims one of Us Weekly's nameless scholars. "He absolutely thinks she’s hot!"
Before your world implodes at the thought of the potential dating pool suddenly and profoundly losing two of its finest stars, let us consider the key fact(s):
You never stood a chance.
