Three is becoming a very important number in the life of Donald "Troll Me Harder" Trump. How many marriages? Three. How many different and entirely contradictory party affiliations throughout his life? Three. And now, how many known aliases? Three, according to Jeb Bush, who recently revealed the pseudonyms for the increasingly ill-toupeed Republican presidential candidate. As quoted in a new piece from Politico, Bush astutely referred to Trump as an "asshole," a "buffoon," and most compellingly a "clown."
Interestingly, Bush's seemingly threatening words coincidentally land on or around the day he takes on Donald Trump in the first major Republican debate. Though ultimately little more than Bill Clinton's Frank Underwood-guided creation of admirably sly implosion tactics, Trump is polling quite well within the party. As the laughably large number of Republican candidates descend further into the depths of debate and proverbial shit-slinging, they enter such territory with the reality that Trump is way, way more popular than them.
Meanwhile, Clinton is slowly puffing a cigar while reclined in his favorite chair and listening to that first Tyler, the Creator album. "Got 'em," he might say before doing a few of those smoke circle things you never could figure out. "Got 'em." Indeed, Bill. Indeed. I mean, just look at Bill's genius in action below: