MTV is bringing back its stop-motion grudge battle series, Celebrity Deathmatch, which was once a late-night staple on its network in the early- to mid-2000s. This was back when boy bands and American Idol dominated television, and smartphones were still just an idea in Steve Jobs' head. Oh, and this is when MTV was still about music.
Celebrity Deathmatch will be making its comeback on MTV2, the same channel that hosted its short-lived reboot in 2006 (MTV hasn't named a launch date for the new series yet). So, why bring it back now? Well, the world is still a horrible place, and celebrities are still beefing with each other, but they've moved from spreading gossip through interviews, songs, and videos, to going after each other through subtweets and hashtags.
Celebrity culture is a hot topic—just ask those girls trying to get lips like Kylie Jenner—and Deathmatch might be enough to satisfy our desires to see shits like Bieber get what's coming to him, because god knows that a Comedy Central Roast can only do so much. The show wasn't just about traditional Hollywood celebs, either. It also took on the political world in one memorable (and cringe-worthy) bout between Monica Lewinsky and Hillary Clinton. Imagine pitting Kim Jong-Un against President Obama—even if it means a TV studio might get hacked.
Throughout its 93-episode run, Deathmatch featured classic fights that pitted celebrities against each other, whether it was because they had a similar sounding name (Mariah Carey and Jim Carrey), or if they happened to share the same line of work (Martin Scorsese and Oliver Stone). Here are the best decapitation-filled matches in Deathmatch history.
11. Charles Manson vs. Marilyn Manson
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When: Pilot
Date: January 1, 1998
One of Deathmatch's inaugural episodes pitted Marilyn Manson against Charles Manson, which was already crazy enough, but showcased the series' taste for finishing moves that rivaled those found in Mortal Kombat. Marilyn would win this match, and every other match he was in, becoming Deatchmatch's own version of the Undertaker at Wrestlemania.
10. Kid Rock vs. Eminem
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When: Season 3, Episode 4
Date: February 17, 2000
Carson Daly was the guest referee for this match, which featured Kid Rock (before he went country) and Eminem (when he was still blonde) duking it out. The match is tame by Deathmatch standards for the first few minutes, that is until Kid Rock's then-bandmate Joe C shows up and takes control of Em's body, and then turns loose on Kid Rock.
9. Sylvester Stallone vs. Arnold Schwarzenegger
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When: Season 1, Episode 2
Date: May 21, 1998
Before The Expendables became a thing, action movie fans longed to see Stallone and Schwarzenegger in the ring together, and two decades ago, Deatchmatch was the closest thing they could get. The fight featured Don King, a death, a resurrection, and ended with both fighters living to fight another day, but with Stallone declared the winner.
8. Mariah Carey vs. Jim Carrey
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When: Season 1, Episode 1
Date: May 14, 1998
Deathmatch's rendition of Jim Carrey is hilarious here. The match featured an appearance by another "Carey" (Drew Carey), and ended when Mariah put a stop to Jim by singing a high-pitched note that made Jim's head explode. Total upset.
7. Mike Tyson vs. Evander Holyfield
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When: Season 2, Episode 1
Date: February 18, 1999
The commentary during Mike Tyson and Evander Holyfield's match is almost as good as the match itself, which is only officially about 10 seconds long. The fight heads out of the arena after Tyson tricks Holyfield. Then he continues to deceive the trusting Holyfield, until one trick goes too far and ends up backfiring on Tyson.
6. Martin Scorsese vs. Oliver Stone
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When: Season 3, Episode 8
Date: July 6, 2000
One of the more creative fights in Deathmatch was the bout between directors Martin Scorsese and Oliver Stone. The fight took the visual styles of their films and incorporated them into the fight, complete with flashbacks to childhood and an emotional soundtrack.
5. John Lennon vs. Paul McCartney vs. George Harrison vs. Ringo Starr
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When: Season 4, Episode 13
Date: April 25, 2002
This fight ends badly if you happen to be the two least popular members of the Beatles. Ringo and George both get killed off by John and Paul, who deliver swift blows to the craniums of their fellow bandmates. But there are no winners declared because John and Paul stop fighting to perform with Yoko Ono. Which, again, leaves no winners.
4. Quentin Tarantino vs. Spike Lee
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When: Season 1, Episode 4
Date: June 4, 1998
In another match that pitted director against director, Spike Lee and Quentin Tarantino were refereed by none other than Woody Allen. Woody gets manhandled, criticized, and used as a weapon throughout the match—until he reaches his breaking point and kills both directors.
3. Hillary Clinton vs. Monica Lewinsky
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When: Season 1, Epsiode 1
Date: May 14, 1998
Deathmatch showed it had balls when it put then-first lady Hillary Clinton in the ring with Monica Lewinsky, the woman whom her husband, President Bill Clinton, claimed he didn't have "sexual relations" with—but totally did. And while Hillary has the upper-hand for most of the match-up, the fight stops once Bill is caught on microphone saying, "Excuse me, miss? Would you mind grabbing my nuts?" He then gets what was coming to him from both women.
2. Madonna vs. Michael Jackson
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When: Season 2, Episode 1
Date: January 31, 1999
During Deathbowl '99, Madonna and MJ fought in a ring surrounded by a pool of hydrochloric acid. The funniest moments come at the expense of Jackson, as he gets knocked into the acid only to reemerge with a version of his face from the '70s, and then morphs into a hamster in his last act to win the fight. It doesn't end well for him.
