Dead Rising was an incredible the video game. In it you could turn anything into a weapon. Guitars, bowling balls, shopping carts—literally anything. And if you were truly dedicated, like I was at 15 years old, you could even unlock a real Mega Buster from Mega Man. It was glorious, and just thinking about it has me way too excited for a 22-year-old man.
Now the video game is being adapted into a movie, with Rob Riggle playing photographer-turned-zombie-apocalypse-MacGyver Frank West. You won't see it in theatres, though, as it's debuting on Crackle. Here's the official synopsis.
Dead Rising: Watchtower takes place during a large-scale zombie outbreak. When a mandatory government vaccine fails to stop the infection from spreading, the four leads must evade infection while also pursuing the root of the epidemic, with all signs pointing to a government conspiracy. Politics, public paranoia, and media coverage play an important role in the story's narrative.
That's nice and all, but what we really want to know is what weapons will Riggle utilize. Will he jab a shower head into a zombie's head and watch blood pour out of the spout? Will he drive a lawn mower over them? And will he have access to the legendary Mega Blaster?
We're dying a boring death by comparison to find out.