Police in Oregon arrested a man who tumbled into a river after being spotted masturbating in public. 

According to the New York Daily News, police in Oregon City, Ore. fielded a call on Saturday afternoon about a naked man who was pleasuring himself in Clackamette Park. Responding officers told the Portland Tribune that 31-year-old Ernest Kirk continued fapping away when they arrived, eventually falling off a cliff bank into the water during his quest for euphoria. 

After the intoxicated Kirk was rescued and hospitalized, authorities charged him with harassment and public indecency, which violated his parole. 

[via New York Daily News and The Portland Tribune]

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