With Orange Is the New Black one of the most popular shows on TV, prison has never been more in. Except, maybe it shouldn’t be.

Ask Men did an enlightening series of interviews with former prisoners, guys who went in for white collar crimes but were intermingled with the general population. Among the pearls of wisdom they offer:

“Those at the bottom are routinely victimized — usually extortion, though I saw child molesters just plain get beat up for fun — so it’s in your best interest to assert yourself as high up as possible, if you have the means to do so.”

“Once you get the reputation as someone who carries or uses a weapon, everyone else is going to approach you armed as well, which is where real danger starts.”

Some of the most severely mentally ill, he says, are “dangerous and combative with officers, [and] sometimes smear fecal matter everywhere. Many of them have diseases. These people do their time and they are back two weeks later. It is a vicious cycle.”

So, yeah, prison sounds pretty terrible, more Oz than Arrested Development. We’ll go ahead and just follow the law, lest we find ourselves getting a reputation and being shived as a result.

[via Ask Men]