So, you’ve decided to get a pet rabbit, and along with that purchase you’ve bought a shit-ton of carrots. Because, of course, carrots do a rabbit’s body good. Actually, no, they don’t. At all. In fact, too many carrots could seriously harm a rabbit. Oh, and that pet mouse you’ve been tossing cheese at for months now—there’s a reason why it’s been about as friendly as an S.S. guard. Mice hate cheese.

This can’t be life.