25 Life Hacks That Make College Years Less Stressful

Chores are for chumps.

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Your days of the sandwich being both breakfast and dinner are limited. The responsibilities that come with adulthood are creeping up, but these subtle tips will give you the appearance of effortless poise without asking you to shed your lazy habits. They may judge, they may question your values and hygiene, but in the end they will be doing dishes and you'll be in your room...free from all menial labor...doing whatever you want...probably naked.

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Clean your computer with a Post-It note.

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Use dental floss to cut cheese and other semi-solids.

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Microwave your own personal cookie, serving size: 1.

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Use an old cassette case as an iPhone stand.

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Put a hunk of bread in your mouth whilst cutting onions.

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Season your popcorn, it'll make each bite taste like a sandwich or assorted smoked meats.

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Your aging laptop is constantly overheating/nearing spontaneous combustion.

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Successfully drink loads of beer in public.

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Bring your favorite koozie to parties and bars.

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You have a morning meeting and can't sleep because the Internet.

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Start a change jar with your roommates, even if you rarely have change to contribute.

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Take a picture of the inside of your refrigerator: instant grocery list.

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Buy two deodorants and keep one in your backpack so you don't smell like the gym.

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Graduation is around the corner and your resume isn't as stellar as you had hoped.

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Cut a hole in the lining of your girlfriend's purse to stash booze.

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Maximize your suitcase and stuff shit in your shoes.

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Still can't kick your nasty smoking addiction?

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Quick coffee sweetener will save you five of those precious morning minutes.

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Paper plates equal no peasant work.

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Keep your college ID until you start balding.

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The Impromptu smitten emoji is your friend.

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Take your suitcase on a trip...to the grocery store.

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Attach all of your grocery bag handles onto a carabiner for the long walk home.

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Bump your slow jams from your DIY phone speaker.

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Rotisserie chicken equals pre-seasoned, pre-cooked chicken.

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